21 hey diddle Recipes

flour, cocoa, baking soda, sugar, brown sugar, margarine, peanut butter, vanilla, egg, peanut butter, icing sugar

sausage , bulk, onion (chopped ), sauerkraut, breadcrumbs (fine, dry ), cream cheese (softened ), parsley (finely snipped ), sweet-hot mustard, garlic salt, pepper, all-purpose flour, eggs, water, fine dry breadcrumb, cooking oil, for deep fat frying

seedless grapes (i used a mix of red & green), raisins, fresh oranges (peeled & sectioned , i had clementines on hand & used 3 of them), crushed pineapple (well-drained ), kiwi (peeled & diced ), yoghurt (i used caramel flavor, but use vanilla just as often), red-hot candies, bananas (sliced in 1/2 in slices)

olive iol, plain flour, onion, chopped, celery, chopped, green capsicum, chopped, garlic, crushed, herbs such as thyme , paprika, sage basil, oregano., whole tomatoes, stock powder (chicken or vegetable..or bacon/ham...), hot sauce, sliced okra, smokey sausage (i used chorizo, if you wanna be proper, use andoilie or whatever it is), handfuls or so of uncooked , tail-on shrimp...or prawns as we call them

ground beef, quick-cooking rolled oats, egg, beaten, dried onion flakes, kosher salt, black pepper, sweetened condensed milk, brown sugar, ketchup, ketchup, brown sugar, dry mustard

lean ground beef, onion, chopped, garlic cloves, minced, olive oil, sliced fresh mushrooms, chopped green pepper, zucchini, cut into 1/2-inch cubes, dry vermicelli, broken into 2inch pieces, salt, pepper, no-salt-added whole tomatoes, reduced-sodium tomato juice, fresh spinach leaves, coarsely chopped (hey, it s back on the market!), grated fresh parmesan cheese

christmas with louise, as a joke , my brother, jay, used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before christmas. he said all he wanted was for santa to fill them., what they say about santa reviewing behavior and checking the list twice must be true because every christmas morning, although jay s kids stockings overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty., year i decided to make his dream come true. i put on sunglasses and with a hat pulled down and went in search of an inflatable love doll. they don tsp sell those things at walmart., i had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. if you ve never been in an x-rated store, don tsp go. you ll only confuse yourself. i was there an hour saying things like, what does this do you re kidding me! who would buy that finally, i made it to the inflatable doll section. i wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my car so i could use the car pool lane, during rush hour. finding what i wanted was difficult. love dolls come in many different models. the top of the line , according to the side of the box, could do things i d only seen in a book on animal husbandry. i settled for lovable louise. she was at the bottom of the price scale. to call louise a doll took a huge leap of imagination., on christmas eve , with the help of an old bicycle pump, louise came to life., my sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours, long after santa had come and gone, i filled the dangling pantyhose with louise s pliant legs and bottom. i also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk on a nearby tray. i went home, and giggled for a couple of hours., next morning my brother called to say that santa had been to his house and left a present that had made him very happy but had left the dog confused. she would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more. we all agreed that louise should remain in her panty hose so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for the traditional christmas dinner., my grandmother noticed louise the moment she walked in the door. what the hell is that she asked. my brother quickly explained , it s a doll. . who would play with something like that granny snapped. i had several candidates in mind, but kept my mouth shut. where are her clothes granny continued., boy , that turkey sure smells nice, gran, jay said, trying to steer her into the dining room. but granny was relentless. why doesn tsp she have any teeth again, i could have answered, but why would i it was christmas and no 1 wanted to ride in the back of the ambulance saying, hang on granny! hang on! ., my grandfather , a delightful old man with very poor eyesight, sidled up to me and said, hey, who s the naked gallon by the fireplace i told him she was jay s friend. a few minutes later i noticed grandpa by the mantel, talking to louise. not just talking, but actually flirting. it was then that we realized this might be grandpa s last christmas at home., dinner went well. we made the usual small talk about who had died , who was dying, and who should be killed, when suddenly louise made a noise that sounded a lot like my father in the bathroom in the morning. then she lurched from the panty hose, flew around the room twice, and fell in a heap in front of the sofa. the cat screamed. i passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering mouth to mouth resuscitation. my brother fell back over his chair and wet his pants laughing and granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room, and sat in the car., it was indeed a christmas to treasure and remember. later in my brother s garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of louise s collapse. we discovered that louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. fortunately, thanks to a wonder drug called duct tape , we restored her to perfect health., louise went on to star in several bachelor party movies. i think grandpa still asks about her whenever he can get out of the house

parsnips, peeled and cut in sticks, equal amount of carrots, peeled and cut in sticks, butter (hey, paula), light brown sugar, nutmeg, grated orange rind, couple grinds of fresh black pepper, chicken stock, some fresh chopped parsley for garnish

cookie dough, flour, cocoa, baking soda, sugar, brown sugar, margarine, peanut butter, vanilla, egg, peanut butter, icing sugar

chicken carcasses, salt, bay leaves (to taste), potatoes, washed , rough cut, leek, washed , rough cut, salt , to taste, pepper , to taste

trout fillets, freshly squeezed lemon juice, salt (optional), olive oil, sugar, green onion, chopped, pepper, dark rum or 3 fl oz cognac, rosemary, fennel, dill, parsley, thyme, sage

light mayonnaise or 1/4 cup regular mayonnaise, seasoned rice vinegar, creole mustard or 1 tbsp country-style grainy mustard, green hot pepper sauce , such as green tabasco, sugar, coleslaw or 3/4 lb cabbage, slaw or 3/4 lb broccoli mix, minced cilantro

purple onion, chopped, lemon, juiced (optional), cucumbers, half peel, seeded, and chopped into 1/2 inch cubes, grape tomatoes , half if they are small and quartered if large, green pepper, chopped , same size as cucumbers, extra virgin olive oil, fresh lemon juice, red wine vinegar, dried oregano, salt and pepper, to taste, feta cheese, crumble, kalamata olive (optional)

skinless chicken breast fillet, butter, leeks, onion, cream of mushroom soup, ground cinnamon, mushrooms, red bell pepper, salt, ground black pepper, ribbon noodles

sugar, margarine, milk, cocoa, vanilla, quick oats, coconut (or replace with 4 cups oats), salt

egg, large, brown (use any kind you want, really), pita bread (approx . 6 inches), american cheese (hey, it was handy! i think cheddar or swiss would be even better!), basil pesto

pie crusts, baked and cooled (or 10-inch tart crust), unflavored gelatin (knox is a good way to go), drambuie (1 airline bottle), canned pumpkin (not pumpkin pie filling, but actual ), heavy cream (hey, it s the holidays... use the !), sugar, egg yolks, lightly beaten, cinnamon, ground ginger, nutmeg, freshly ground, allspice, salt, egg whites, sugar, cream of tartar

oil, brussels, shredded, red pepper, thinly sliced, carrot, thinly sliced, garlic clove, crushed, water chestnuts, drained, baby corn, drained (i use frozen corn kernals, kecap manis (sweet soy sauce), sweet chilli sauce, toasted sesame seeds