13259 christmas day you day Recipes

christmas with louise, as a joke , my brother, jay, used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before christmas. he said all he wanted was for santa to fill them., what they say about santa reviewing behavior and checking the list twice must be true because every christmas morning, although jay s kids stockings overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty., year i decided to make his dream come true. i put on sunglasses and with a hat pulled down and went in search of an inflatable love doll. they don tsp sell those things at walmart., i had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. if you ve never been in an x-rated store, don tsp go. you ll only confuse yourself. i was there an hour saying things like, what does this do you re kidding me! who would buy that finally, i made it to the inflatable doll section. i wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my car so i could use the car pool lane, during rush hour. finding what i wanted was difficult. love dolls come in many different models. the top of the line , according to the side of the box, could do things i d only seen in a book on animal husbandry. i settled for lovable louise. she was at the bottom of the price scale. to call louise a doll took a huge leap of imagination., on christmas eve , with the help of an old bicycle pump, louise came to life., my sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours, long after santa had come and gone, i filled the dangling pantyhose with louise s pliant legs and bottom. i also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk on a nearby tray. i went home, and giggled for a couple of hours., next morning my brother called to say that santa had been to his house and left a present that had made him very happy but had left the dog confused. she would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more. we all agreed that louise should remain in her panty hose so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for the traditional christmas dinner., my grandmother noticed louise the moment she walked in the door. what the hell is that she asked. my brother quickly explained , it s a doll. . who would play with something like that granny snapped. i had several candidates in mind, but kept my mouth shut. where are her clothes granny continued., boy , that turkey sure smells nice, gran, jay said, trying to steer her into the dining room. but granny was relentless. why doesn tsp she have any teeth again, i could have answered, but why would i it was christmas and no 1 wanted to ride in the back of the ambulance saying, hang on granny! hang on! ., my grandfather , a delightful old man with very poor eyesight, sidled up to me and said, hey, who s the naked gallon by the fireplace i told him she was jay s friend. a few minutes later i noticed grandpa by the mantel, talking to louise. not just talking, but actually flirting. it was then that we realized this might be grandpa s last christmas at home., dinner went well. we made the usual small talk about who had died , who was dying, and who should be killed, when suddenly louise made a noise that sounded a lot like my father in the bathroom in the morning. then she lurched from the panty hose, flew around the room twice, and fell in a heap in front of the sofa. the cat screamed. i passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering mouth to mouth resuscitation. my brother fell back over his chair and wet his pants laughing and granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room, and sat in the car., it was indeed a christmas to treasure and remember. later in my brother s garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of louise s collapse. we discovered that louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. fortunately, thanks to a wonder drug called duct tape , we restored her to perfect health., louise went on to star in several bachelor party movies. i think grandpa still asks about her whenever he can get out of the house

day-old bread cubes, crust removed, tart apples, peeled and chopped, dried cranberries or raisins, egg yolks, eggs, heavy whipping cream, milk, sugar, heavy whipping cream, sugar, vanilla or rum extract, ground cinnamon and nutmeg

boneless skinless chicken breast halves (4 oz each), sour cream, lemon juice, worcestershire sauce, celery salt, pepper, paprika, seasoned salt, garlic salt, crushed butter-flavored crackers, canola oil, butter, melted

real milk chocolate chips (or dark, if you prefer ), white almond bark, cut into small (1-inch), marshmallows, crisp rice cereal, salted peanuts or 1 cup un, red maraschino cherries, drained, and cut in half, green glazed cherries, drained and quartered, angel flake coconut, oil

christmas plum pudding or 200 g christmas cake, brandy, icing sugar, egg white, dragees (silver balls)

butter, softened, unsweetened chocolate, sugar, eggs, beaten well, vanilla, all-purpose flour, cream cheese, softened, sugar, peppermint extract or 1/2 tsp cherry extract or 1/2 tsp orange extract or 1/2 tsp lemon extract (use whatever you like to go with whatever color you want), red/pink for valentine s day, green for st. patrick s day, red or green for christmas, blue for ha), non-dairy whipped topping, thawed (cool whip), semi-sweet chocolate chips or 1/4 cup milk chocolate chips, melted (optional)

christmas plum pudding, milk, double cream, vanilla ice cream, brandy

christmas honey fruit drops, mixed chopped candied fruits and peels , chopped candied cherries, raisins, and chopped pecans, bourbon, brown sugar, honey, butter or margarine, eggs, all purpose flour, baking soda, ground cinnamon, ground nutmeg, baking powder, dairy sour cream, combine fruits , nuts, and bourbon. cover, let stand several hours. in mixer bowl cream sugar, honey, and butter or margarine. beat in eggs. mix dry ingredients. add to creamed mixture alternately with sour cream. stir fruit mixture into creamed mixture. drop by tsp onto greased cookie sheet. bake in 350 degree oven for 10 to 12 minutes. cool on wire rack. frost, if desired. makes about 5 dozen cookies.

handfuls sun-dried tomatoes (preferably whole ), fresh or dried fettuccine, skinless chicken breasts, white wine , to taste, oregano , to taste, chopped garlic, pepper , to taste, pine nuts, olive oil, green peppers, red peppers, eggplant chopped, combined basil , olive oil, pine nuts, parmesan cheese and garlic blended very well (i.e., pesto), green peas, cilantro, margarine, curry powder

bulk sausage browned for 5 minutes, sliced mushrooms, onions, eggs lightly beaton, milk, day old italian bread cut into small slices, swiss cheese shredded

butter, vanilla wafer crumbs, green glazed cherries, halved, candied red cherries, halved, candied pineapple, chopped, dates, chopped, chopped nuts (any kind you desire), sweetened condensed milk, bourbon

manicotti, butter, divided, fresh mushrooms, sliced, garlic cloves, pressed, spinach, thawed & squeezed, ricotta cheese (or cottage cheese that you ve whirled in the blender), egg, beaten, salt, pepper, butter, flour, half-and-half cream or 2 cups cream, salt, shredded cheese (whatever you like), whole wheat bread, shredded mozzarella cheese (combination) or 2 cups cheddar cheese (combination) or 2 cups parmesan cheese (combination), butter, melted

gammon ham, unsweetened pineapple juice, golden syrup or 3 tbsp clear honey, if you prefer, pineapple rings, drained & cut into chunks (or use ready diced ), tip of a tsp cinnamon

butter, white sugar, eggs, flour, cocoa, cinnamon, nutmeg, mace, ginger, allspice, baking soda, strong coffee, currants, raisins, chopped nuts (pecans or what you like), chopped candied cherry, chopped candied pineapple, chopped citron, chopped dates, chopped candied grapefruits or 1/4 lb orange peel

granulated sugar, butter, eggs + 1 egg yolk, all-purpose flour, baking powder, milk, raisins , soaked in whiskey or you can even substitute candied orange peel or cherries or cranberries..., lemon extract, cardamom (you can add more, it depends on your personal taste), icing, i make a simple glaze to drizzle over the top.

bread, thick sliced , preferably day old, turkey gravy, leftover, cooked turkey, turkey stuffing, leftover (aka dressing), cranberry sauce, salt & freshly ground black pepper, to taste, ground sage, monterey jack pepper cheese, sliced (any type of cheese is good)

crisp rice cereal (christmas colored rice krispies), marshmallows, caramel squares, eagle brand condensed milk, butter